What We Win - looking at positivity/negativity and winning at life

I made a statement to a friend the other day: "I always win." It was meant to be nothing more than a quip, as I certainly have never seemingly 'won' anything in my life. However, over the next couple of days this retort took on a very new meaning.

Every day I was asked by this friend "so what did you win today." To which we recounted for each other all of the things that could seemingly be 'wins' for us that day...

"I didn't get stuck in the snow"
"I got to spend 6 hours with children making movies"
"I got to help people find awesome books that they will really enjoy"
"I was able to help out a friend in need, and do yoga with them"
"The sun shone down (giving me vitamin D), and the birds were singing to me as I shoveled my driveway for 3 hours this morning!"


It forced me to look at the daily tasks of my life in a new and different way. Instead of getting upset that I ran out of propane when I was in the middle of baking muffins, it became "I was able to go into town and get a free coffee from the a nice man at the gas station."

These little shifts in perspective have made a huge difference in my life, and can make in anyone's who cares to benefit.

I have always been a little bit skeptical of the "think positive and you will be happy" mentality. Having generally had a fairly positive disposition my entire life I often found that it seemed forced, or even fake to just put a smile on your face and turn the heart-wrenchingly difficult situation around.

Because lets face it... some things are simply just negative, painful and wrong. There is no smile that is going to cure it. It will only mask the real issue, and eventually cause more pain. Dealing with these realities and moving on to something more positive seems to be a far more enticing tactic... for me anyways.

 But this seemed like a nice compromise. Something to make your day seem brighter. It is a way to look at something, like shoveling snow for 3 hours, that may not be your favourite thing to do, in a way that makes you feel like you have accomplished something wonderful, and be thankful for that opportunity.

It is a way to look back on your day and be thankful for all the beautiful moments as well, not simply because you had to switch the negatives into the positives, but because you were able to see the small things that may have otherwise passed by, and can appreciate the people, things and world that is right in front of you, instead of focusing on the things or people that "did not" or "have not."

What a world.

What did you win today?

I get to live here..... ;)

Cabin Life: Marking a Year and a true SOURDOUGH

This past month marked a year that I have been in the Yukon. It seems like forever ago that I made that long emotionally perilous solo journey across the country to an unknown place to live; but somehow it seems like no time has passed at all.
It has been a year of rebuilding, breaking down and rebuilding again. There were so many unanswered questions, and so much feeling alone... But that is a post for another day, today we celebrate the year of becoming a SOURDOUGH! 
Being a Sourdough in the Yukon is defined as  "A permanent resident of the territory. Someone who has lived in the Yukon during all four seasons." (according to Wiki)
This year has been remarkable in so many ways. I have learned things about myself and other people, I have become stronger in myself than ever before, I feel more independent and sure of myself in my decisions, because I know that I am making them for myself, not for someone else... even if that decision is based around someone else.

I was recently asked to be a part of a documentary that a lovely woman, Siobhan, is doing. After a chance meeting at my workplace, she asked if she would be able to interview me about living in a cabin in the north. The documentary is taking place across north america, she is hitching from anchorage, AK to NYC in hopes of meeting different characters and experiencing different ways of living in order to explore the concept of freedom and what it means to them. When asked on my opinion of freedom and what it means I felt a little bit stumped for a moment... isn't freedom just living...
After sharing a few laughs and stories with Siobhan I realised that freedom was more than just living. It was the way that you choose to live your life, and the ability to choose is freedom in and of itself.
 To me living free is the ability to do things on my own, and finding out how strong and self sufficient i can be. Living in a cabin in the Yukon has been a wonderful experience for me, though challenging at times, I wouldn't take it back for anything. There are days when I long for running water, which would enable me to take nice, long, hot shower, or turn on the tap and wash my dishes with ease. But then I look at how appreciative I have become of those things. I am the only one i have to depend on. If i don't get water, then I have nothing to drink or cook with. If i don't chop enough wood, or make a fire for myself, I will most likely freeze to death, and I only have myself to blame.

Anyways, this year was fantastic and absolutely life-changing in so many ways (for the better) and I believe it was the right decision for me. I love living in the Yukon and can't wait to spend a lot more time exploring the freedom that it allows me to have.

Also, I am committing myself to writing at least two blog posts per week for the month of October. So expect to see a lot more posts about cabin living and if you want to see a post on something in particular that you wonder about, let me know!

in the mean time, enjoy some pictures of a few of my epic adventures.

reflektion

I wrote this just over a month ago when the cold still held tightly to the night air, and the darkness penetrated our minds so deeply we almost forgot about the light. The sun has returned with a vengeance and with it helped to open our wings and allow us to ruffle the water off of our feathers and begin to breathe again.

The northern lights have been lighting up the sky for the past two days with their curious light. they  move like little phantoms come to show us their tricks and leave us in awe and wonder. the colours and movement draw people from the slumbers into the cold nights air to be a part of a collective experience. even as you are standing alone on the middle of a field, lake, mountain range or street... you can't help but wonder how many other eyes are glued to the sky at that moment; seeing the same things as you... but not actually seeing the same thing in the nights sky's dancing display.
Each person's experience with the northern lights are different. they bring out a sense of awe and wonder in us that seems to tap into a resource that my be unknown to many. a forgotten realm within their minds that can only be accessed at moments like this.
its the part of our minds that bring memories, experiences and circumstance to the surface. its a part of our brain that may be locked away that we never knew wasn't there until we finally found that it was missing.
nights like these make me want to dance.

The sky is awake, so I'm awake. lets play.

The First Snow

Snow. I have a love hate relationship with it.

It has been a while since the first snow here in the Yukon. We are now old hats at wiping our cars clear of the 20 cm that fell the night before, and shoveling our way out of the house, defrosting our door-handles with hairdryers, getting up at 3 am to stoke the fire and making sure the car is plugged in so that it doesn't groan quite as much when we try to go to work.

However, the first snow came all too soon for me. I had been expecting it, anticipating it and basically all around frightened of it. I'm not sure if it was the idea of 8 months of winter that scared me, or the passing of another season. The fall losing its grasp as each day more and more leaves fell to the ground and the air became a bit more crisp.

I woke up one morning with a chill running through my bones. The blankets had come off of my bare feet in the night and I pulled my feet up underneath into the warmth and shuttered. I rolled over and tried to go back to sleep, but the cold had nipped my cheeks and I was forced to get up and put a log on the fire. As I padded across the cool floor in the darkness of the early morning winter I noted to myself that this was the first morning since my arrival that I had been made to get out of bed because of the cold and start a fire anew. up until this moment my fire had held me through the night, allowing me to wake in comfort and pull on a sweater to go make my coffee before re setting the stove.

As i reached the door I paused for a moment, the windows were still dark and the sleep had not yet left my eyes, but something seemed different, the shades seemed to be pulled tightly to their frames, held there, hiding something from my eyes. I pulled open the door to retrieve my wood and was shocked when in front of me was 10 cm of freshly fallen snow. I quickly slammed the door shut, uttered a few obscenities and promptly climbed back into bed and pulled the blankets over my head.
"It's all over" I thought desperately to myself.

I knew this day was coming, but I wasn't ready. The snow falls in the Yukon and takes up post until the spring thaw, which (I've heard) doesn't come until at least May. It was the end of the bare ground being present in my life and the beginning of something new. The days would quickly become darker, the temperature would drop dramatically; sometimes below -40, the days would now include shoveling, plugging in cars, and an ever increasing difficulty in chopping wood and keeping the cabin warm through the cold days and nights.

I peered out from under the blankets and pulled back the shades to look outside. The trees were covered in a light dusting of white, creating a contrast with the greens of the pines that looked almost surreal. the forest seemed to go on forever. There was a stillness that i hadn't yet experienced, and didn't know how to react to. It was as though everything was stopped and sitting in awe.
Looking at the tiny white flakes fall to the ground I got up and again went to the door, this time prepared; dawning boots, and mittens i stepped outside and took a breath of the cool crisp new air.

Maybe snow wouldn't be so bad after-all

update

So, its been a while since i have posted. i have about 4 posts started that i will have to finish this week. and post. perhaps ill amalgamate them into one, since they mostly deal with the idea of the holiday season.
I have been faced with a few challenges over the past couple of weeks. getting through the holidays without my family and friends was probably the hardest thing i have had to do in a while.However, i did have a very memorable and wonderful Christmas. 
I have now entered into the 'extra classes' phase of the year. This is the time of year when students are 'off school' for the month of January. This however does not mean that they do not come to school or continue with their lessons. No, in fact it seems as though the students have a more rigorous schedule; moving from place to place starting at 9am and finishing god knows when! I suppose its to prepare them for the level up they are about to embark on (in march). But classes are on. students are able to sign up for classes specific to what they would like to improve on. Every week there are different classes, and some are for 3-4 hours per day. I find it absolutly amazing that these children are in school rather than enjoying their time off, as many north americans would be doing. Its great but at the same time, there are a lot of reasons why continual school isn't the best thing. 
I have been struggling with the childrens inability to imagine things since i arrived. i have attempted to challenge them to 'create.' to make something of their own that may be new and original. Yet, time after time, this fails. they are strictly regimented and without rigid structure are completly lost. They have no idea where to go. In a recent class i had set up a project for the students to 'create their own superhero.' I thought they might enjoy this; seeing as how these types of charachters are often popular. I explained to them what a superhero was, and how, for our case, they didn't necessarily have to be a masked character. Twilight, a popular phenomenon world round, can see Edward and Jacob as hero's for our case. I then challenged them to come up with a name and a special trait that their hero had.  This took  45 minutes.Their creativity and ability to think 'outside the box' is simply not there. It seems to be stripped away at a young age. They are forced into these molds and unable to escape from them for fear of standing out.

So for two weeks i teach two classes, each is two hours long. its not too bad. the first is the 3rd grade middle school. they have yet to show up for class, there are only 5 studnets signed up for classes. but they just haven't shown up. fine with me, only i spent a whole week coming up with a lesson plan for them. oh well...